For months, I found myself in a place of fear, doubt, anxiety, etc. Every day, I had to push to get myself out of bed, get myself ready, and drive myself to work.
My brain was firing a million thoughts a second, and my heart was beating to a similar drum. Thoughts, emotions, all of it, firing grenades at me to get me to my lowest point.
I found myself so desperate for answers, I turned to the only thing that could grant me the comfort I needed. The Word of God.
As I searched for passages on doubt, fear, and anxiety, I landed at Matthew 14:22-33, the account of Jesus walking on the water.
I had read this passage multiple times, but Jesus spoke so much truth into my heart that afternoon, and I will never forget what He taught me.
I got to verse 29, where Peter gets out of the boat and starts walking on the water toward Jesus. “He said, ‘Come.’ So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus.”
First off, wow! Peter was walking on water, toward Jesus. His eyes were fixed on Jesus.
But notice what happened next. As soon as Peter saw the wind and the waves, he was afraid and started to sink.
At this moment, I was thinking, “Yes! This is where I am. I feel like waves are crashing around me, and I’m just sinking further and further down.”
But what I read next was so amazing.
Immediately, Jesus reached out His hand and took hold of Peter.
He didn’t wait for Peter to attempt to get himself back up, but He immediately grabbed hold of him, saying, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?”
Was Jesus reprimanding him?
Peter took His eyes off the Son of God and started to fear for his life, forgetting that Jesus was right in front of him.
But Jesus was not condemning Peter, and He did not come to condemn us. He comes to us from a place of love, reminding us of His presence with us.
Then, I read and saw something I’d never seen before: “And when they got into the boat, the wind ceased.”
Hold it right there … when they got into the boat, the wind ceased. Jesus was walking with Peter to the boat while the winds and waves were still crashing.
God doesn’t leave us in the midst of our waves (fear, doubt, anxiety, lack of faith, etc.). He walks with us.
As soon as the Holy Spirit spoke that truth into my heart, I burst into tears.
For the longest time, I believed I was alone, fighting through the waves on my own. I attempted to get through life on my own strength because I wanted control. I wanted to be the one who got myself out of the crashing waves.
But the Holy Spirit graciously spoke truth into my heart, saying, “If you try to do this on your own, you will sink. Grab onto My hand. I will walk with you through the crashing waves. It may be awhile till we get to the boat, but I promise, I will be with you in the midst of it all.”
Friends, God doesn’t promise us a life without storms, but He does promise to walk with us, right beside us, holding onto us.
What waves are your eyes fixed on? Are you aware of Jesus’ presence with you?